Let it rain! (Yep and then because I'm British I am entitled to complain about the rain and request more sun, converse extensively about the weather and how it affects this and that, blah blah 🤦♀️).
"From now on if you listen obediently to the commandments that I am commanding you today, love God, your God, and serve him with everything you have within you, he’ll take charge of sending the rain at the right time, both autumn and spring rains, so that you’ll be able to harvest your grain, your grapes, your olives. He’ll make sure there’s plenty of grass for your animals. You’ll have plenty to eat". (Deuteronomy 11v14)
I love the fact that ultimately I can rely on and trust God with everything, including the weather, but at the same time we have to fulfil our human responsibility to preserve and protect our planet, it is our duty and God given role 💜.
Ingrid x
The God who sees.
It’s so often used as a threat and a stick with which to wield condemnation, casting aspersions to make us recoil with discomfort, imagining a God waiting with relish to observe what sin we may indulge in today, taking note of our faults then calling us to account. It exudes negativity and the need for punishment.
If the seeds of bitterness hadn’t already taken ahold then the looming threat of ‘God can see you’ would certainly fertilise and assist their growth! A sense of self repulsion / never being good enough would add to possible doubt and anger ... how on earth can I live in a spiritually acceptable way?
That’s not my God! It’s certainly not the characteristic of a truly loving father.
Of course I’m not refuting the fact that God is all knowing and all seeing in that He does indeed see and know our sin. However he takes no delight in that, it grieves him. His desire is to forgive it and to wipe it away with no recourse or dredging it back up again.
My God is full of tender compassion and loving kindness, willing to save anyone who looks to him and cries out for help. He sees, yes he sees … he sees the broken heart; he sees the loneliness; he sees the suffering, the grief and pain; his heart breaks too … he sees those innermost struggles and anxieties; he sees the doubt, the shame, the fear … he sees the weakness; he sees the vulnerability; he sees the cruelty and he sees the caving in to temptation. He sees to the deepest depth of your heart and soul … and he loves. He loves so much. When hurt in the worst way possible, when you have no ounce of self respect left, when you even doubt his presence … yes even then he adores you. To him you are most precious and of great value and worth.
He sees you right now exactly where you are and he cares. He cares about those momentary stresses and the tiredness which the cares of the day have led to. He sees and understand the nervousness about the next step in your life and your struggle with patience. He understands the complexities of mental health and addiction. He knows and he sees it all.
Hagar was used and then discarded. A single mother alone with a child, abandoned, frightened and facing a slow death, but God saw her (Genesis 21). He protected and provided when no one else was around.
Jesus sought out individuals and noticed those who were invisible or insignificant to others, even those who were hated by the majority (like Zacchaeus). Each one precious to him (the man at the pool of Bethesda), each one seen and known (the woman with the bleeding disorder). It didn’t mean there weren’t problems in life but it did (and does) mean that he is with us in them … now that’s a pretty wonderful and reliable hand to hold.
We are fully known and unconditionally loved! ❤️
Nothing you have done is irredeemable.
I stumbled across the most relevant song, beautifully written and sung by Kathie Lee Gifford and Nicole C Mullen, please take a listen … 'The God Who Sees':
I am so glad that God sees me. No matter that there are millions of other people on the planet … he sees me … and he sees you. It’s like the warmest embrace and most reassuring security you could ever imagine or wish for.
Ingrid x
Tend the garden of your heart and soul.
I have a garden. I love it, truly I do.
I wrote in a previous blog post about gardening (Sept ‘21), how that I was struck by considering how God created a garden, not just speaking it into being, but planting it (Genesis 2v8) … it’s as though He actively took part in the planting and design of it, especially for his new human friends.
Today I’m rather more taken up with weeds! More specifically this one … “Ground elder is a herbaceous, perennial plant. It spreads via rhizomes (underground stems), which can regenerate from just a tiny fragment left in the ground … ground elder can easily creep in from a neighbouring garden or nearby wasteland. It can also be unknowingly introduced with new plants if pieces of its fleshy, white rhizome are hidden within the compost of the rootball or are tucked away among the roots of the plant.” (RHS)
I call it a weed but it is in fact a plant. There’s no stopping it! It’s taking over my borders and infringing upon anything within its underground rhizome reach. It would take dedicated time every day to get on top of it, or to just poison the whole garden, killing everything then starting from scratch (not too desirable or environmentally friendly). However, if I had been here when the first one crept over from the neighbors garden and had carefully dug it up, roots and all, then fastidiously watched out for the next one and proceeded with the culling process, I would have protected my garden and not have the huge influx which I now face. I inherited the ‘problem’ as the ground elder was already rather happily established when I purchased the property but the principle of careful maintenance and awareness of spread still applies.
So many distractions, excuses, good works and seeing the needs in others can take our focus from the weeds spreading in our own spiritual lives. Subtly, under the surface, creating a invasive root system which then presents above the surface as something ugly. Discretion and wisdom are required to pay attention to the warning signs of early weed growth and then drastic action required to kick them in to touch before their roots multiply.
In every life this weed may present itself in a different way. Your vulnerability and temptation will be different to mine.
Be warned … it is so easy in life to see the ‘weeds’ in someone else and to even encourage them to deal with them (Matt 7v3-4), whilst your own invasive network is galloping away, taking over another area of your heart and life.
So the next time you reach for your ‘roundup stump killer’ or even just see some weeds, consider the soil of your heart and take note of what’s being nurtured. The more we fill our minds and souls with God’s word and truth, the less space there will be for toxic substance. The fruit of the spirit (Gal 5v22-23) and armour of God (Eph 6v10-18) will bring light and life, quelling negative invasions. Those subtle workings of darkness in the shadows desperately want to emerge in outworkings in your life and mine (1 Peter 5v8) … let’s say no! and daily make sure our root system is embedded in the true vine (John 15v4), one which bears fruit for the glory of our God.
Ingrid x
With scarily intrusive media and the smallness of the world these days, along with the insatiable desire for gossip, it's astonishing that Her Majesty has remained so preserved from slander. Throughout history I suggest she's among very few who have had to lead for such a length of time yet have retained admiration, respect and love from those who know her, even if at arms length. Whilst other leaders flail to maintain any sense of dignity and honesty, she remains unflappable; resolute in her duty; calm in her disposition and unswerving in her faith.
It's her faith which appears to ground her despite circumstances, demands and grief. This solid foundation ... her trust in God; her higher power to which she can defer and go to for help, guidance and counsel.
Trust cannot be demanded, coerced or be found at a whim when the sudden need for it is upon us. Trust is gained as a natural consequence of a relationship worked on.
Who is the Queen likely to trust? Not many I wager! Those whom she does trust will be people whom she has got to know over a long period of time. They will have shown time and again their loyalty, care, devotion and commitment to her without the need for any public recognition in return. Yet even the best of confidants here on earth can fail, slip up, have a change of heart and cause disappointment.
There is only one on whom we can depend, and like Her Majesty, it is God alone.
Even though He is God, it does not mean that we will find trusting Him easy, especially when we face trials and temptations. It is only through the development of a close relationship, maturing over time, that our first response in the face of a storm will be to intuitively trust Him. When that trust and a deep, inner knowledge and acute awareness of His care, grief and pain alongside ours, is our primary reaction, only then will we know the peace that passes all human comprehension. It will take up residence within us confounding all other more human responses ... because it is from Him.
God will never misuse trust in Him. He will never take advantage, abuse or demand a favour in return. He wants our dependence, love and trust ... He wants it so much (that special relationship bond with each of us), so much so that He gave all He had, His only Son ... in return we get grace for those times of need, peace, liberty and hope for a much better future!
Abide in Him; develop a daily knowledge of who He is; depend on Him for all things ... the natural outcome = trust, peace and freedom. ❤️
Ingrid x
Ok so I appreciate that the title of this blog is rather a huge subject and greatly debated with many schools of thought by those far more qualified and learned than myself.
So that being said, I’ll of course stick to my simple ramblings and musings.
Following a conversation with a new friend and realising that we both had big decisions to make this year, I was driving home asking God to make his will known and to show the way ahead to both her and myself.
I struggle with the fact that it’s so hard to know what God’s will is for a certain decision when in fact it should surely be easy because after all He wants us to walk in His will, so why wouldn’t He make it clear for us … to help us avoid mistakes? As I questioned God again with this whole thought process I realised what I needed to do was to stop all trains of thought and clear the crazy chaos of cognition away. My jumbled thoughts racing in all directions just clouds and fogs up rather than bringing clarity.
At that point, God through Jesus simply said and says “Follow Me”. That’s it!
What better way to calm the soul and make sense of the scrambled egg mind. At the sound of those words from the one who holds my breath in his hands whilst upholding all things by the word of his power; the need to understand every detail relating to my options and plans just melts away. It’s ok. He’s got it.
All I need to do is to make sure I’m following Him. That’s it.
I may not know what lays ahead. I may not understand the paths I could be asked to walk or decisions which will unfold, but I do know that if I am following God through His word (Jesus) then he will be the light, shining the exact amount needed for my next step. He will light the way and provide for the way … and it will be good.
Perspective and priority … first things first, just follow Him. All else will fall into place and be amazingly less significant than how it appeared prior to the re-shuffle in priorities and perspective.
Jesus wasn’t complicated or cryptic, he simply said “follow me”. There was no need for questions around provision or timings, location or salary. He was more than enough to satisfy any anxieties, and he still is.
Live in the moment and follow Him. No one has or ever will regret it.
Ingrid x
Martha Washington once said “I’ve learned that the greater part of happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances”.
Now granted, our circumstances are often very likely to thwart bubbling happiness. A grief; a diagnosis; false accusation; injustice; heartache; conflict; war; debt … however it is our disposition when after the initial human response period has passed, which does in fact dictate our ongoing potential for happiness and peace.
Each one of us would more than likely resort to some form of horror, shock or despair at unexpected and extremely challenging circumstances but it is the ability to then dig deep and tap into the bedrock of truth in our faith which gives that propulsion forward into growth, maturity, wisdom and acceptance. This can then lead to that peace we are told about in God’s word (so therefore it’s true) beyond human comprehension (Phil 4v7). Our dispositions change, becoming ones of light and happiness despite circumstances.
As Paul stated so simply to the Christian’s at Philippi … he was not at all worried about his circumstances but had learned within any given situation, to be content. There’s a inner peace needed when you’re content, truly content. It breeds a serenity and poise which elevates that person to a higher plane no matter how destitute their condition may seem to others looking on.
I’ve quoted before “Life with God is not immunity from difficulties, but peace in difficulties” (CS Lewis). I know having peace within doesn’t mean happiness without, but it does give a perspective from the divine. A knowledge of God’s working within will be noticeable externally and almost tangibly flow out to others … no doubt cascading an uplifting effect to any in its wake.
Let us prayerfully be those who despite the cares of this world, can trust that our God is big enough and cares enough to uphold us, give us peace and love through our circumstance so that others see that same love in our eyes for them and their own challenges. Let us be light, bright enough to dispel darkness.
Lord let me be your hands and feetHello readers! It’s been a while. I’ve been convincing myself to stop writing this blog and call it a day. I’ve told myself that no-one would notice or miss it, which may well be true, but the fact of the matter is that I have missed it in some ways. When I used to write something twice or three times a week, I benefitted greatly in a personal way. So here I am … going to share my complaints about Rooks! 😠 🤦♀️
I think they are rooks at least, rather than crows, although I find it hard to tell them apart. Whichever they are they are immensely annoying right now.
To say I must look like some frantic maniac at the window may be an understatement if you ask my children! I would be too embarrassed to count the amount of times during one day that I rush up to the kitchen window, flailing my arms around and bashing, likely to put the wooden spoon through the window itself.
These large birds just keep returning to hang off the feeders meant for the smaller species. There were 2 which would make their appearances at the back of the house and once scared off by this crazy human, would simply fly to the front of the house to access the feeders hanging from the apple trees! 🙄 Oversized pigeons would join them to make my infuriation levels reach fever point. To add insult to injury, there are now four of the dastardly birds … as though they’ve recruited reinforcements.
1 Kings 17v2-6. God specifically chose the ravens (pretty much like the rook) to feed Elijah morning and evening with bread and meat during the time he hid in a ravine east of the Jordan river. Now why did God do that? Why didn’t he choose the mighty Eagle? Who knows. Maybe it was simply to acknowledge the fact that despite appearances and manners, everything God created has a purpose and is precious to Him. Maybe it was so that you and I are reminded of this fact every time we shoo away a rook!
God’s ways are higher and greater than ours. He values the ravens and the rooks. He takes note of every fallen sparrow (whom I much prefer seeing in my garden). He wishes us to mount up with wings like eagles. His creation is diverse and beautiful.
The rooks in my garden are more than likely just trying to feed themselves and in time, their young. My preference is for the smaller garden birds yet these cumbersome greedy black birds once took food to a prophet hiding by a river as directed by their creator. Amazing! It’s sort of beyond my comprehension to fully grasp that if God asked one of the birds in my garden to do something specific or go about a task, that they would have no choice but to fulfill it and obey.
It’s a lesson I need to learn over and over, in fact more than one lesson …
The first part is to not be judgmental based on appearances. In certain settings it could well be me who’s perceived as the rook!
Secondly, to appreciate that everyone has a role to play and is of immense value to God no matter how I may feel or react. My annoyance could well be misplaced with the appearance of something masking the purpose beneath.
Thirdly, no matter what we’re asked to do by God, the only sensible and wise thing to do is to obey.
I muse upon the fact that many lessons can be learnt from a garden. Mindfully spend time with nature and learn from her many profound yet simple instructions. You will grow wiser and nicer too! 😊
Ingrid x
Two songs came to mind after someone at church this morning prayed in relation to the war in Ukraine. They prayed for angel armies! There are so many occasions where the direct intervention and display of God’s might has changed the course of history. He can still do the impossible. Russia is no barrier to God’s plans; Putin is no foe too great for God’s power.
Thinking of angel armies … In 2 Kings 6 Elisha is under threat of capture by the Arameans. They find out that he’s at Dothan which leads the king to send many chariots and horses to surround the entire city. When Elisha’s servant got up early the next morning and went outside, he saw troops, horses and chariots everywhere! Distressed he cried to Elisha “oh no my lord! what shall we do now?” … Elisha replied “Don’t be afraid, those who are with us are more than those who are with them”, then he prayed “open his eyes Lord, so that he may see”. What a sight awaited him! He saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.
I believe those angel armies are still available today. In the words of these songs I think about the country of Ukraine as a whole and also every individual affected. God knows every single one … He has gone before and He cares immensely about every moment of suffering. He can truly empathise.
I will share the songs but if you’d rather read the lyrics here, I’ve written them out. 🇺🇦
‘Rescue’ by Lauren Daigle:
🇺🇦 I’ve no idea what you’re like, maybe you prefer not to listen to the news and would rather go about your business as normal. I can’t seem to do that. I do listen and I get affected. The situation in Ukraine is devastating, wrong and sad. The bravery and commitment of the people there is wonderful to see, their leader a solid, unwavering example of fortitude in the face of fear. Their future is unknown against the progressing might of the Russian forces.
It’s easy to get taken up with all the detail and the straight forward facts like Russia having a greater army and military arsenal so therefore its just a matter of time before Ukraine is completely invaded. However it doesn’t take much digging into history to see that there are many examples of the ‘smaller’ and less likely nation / side winning. June 1967 the six day war … Israel vs a coalition of Arab states including Egypt, Syria and Jordan … against all odds, Israel stood firm.
An easy Bible example is Gideon (Judges 7) … an army reduced by God from over 32,000 to 300 men and then Gideon divided the 300 into 3 companies … so only 100 men in each section! This against: “The Midianites, the Amalekites and all the other eastern peoples had settled in the valley, thick as locusts. Their camels could no more be counted than the sand on the seashore” (v12).
Gideon and his men prevailed … how could they do otherwise when God Almighty was with them. Against all odds humanly speaking but a guaranteed success when God is in the camp.
I like this verse: “my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart” (Psalm 73v26).
The only thing greater than hate, evil and fear is love … but this cannot be any ordinary love, it is a greater love and force than we can humanly conjure up, it comes from God. He enables us to face our fears and overcome … against all odds, he will give the power to prevail.
In the darkest of moments we need one thing … hope. Strength can arise if hope is in our hearts. I pray that those currently experiencing conflict firsthand will not lose hope and that the God of Gideon will provide a way of peace … against all odds.
Ingrid x
How free a robin seems to me. How little to worry about or plan for. Life may have its perils but it is simple.
I’ve been considering simplification recently and as a home group we took a week to discuss it (there is a chapter headed ‘Simplicity’ in the book ‘100 stand alone Bible studies). In the commentary the writer says “the practice of simplicity is a matter of watching our boundaries to see that our lives are protected for God … in a high tech world … where multi-tasking is admired … maintaining a discipline of simplicity is foreign territory”.
Let’s face it, there is so much to do in a day! Many of those ‘things’ are ok and necessary but there are a lot which if we’re honest, are distractions and certainly not necessary. There are also things that can be delayed in order to create space and time within the current day. It may require organisation, lists and consistent commitment to some change, however the de-clutter of our physical space and our schedule gives way to greater opportunities for good … and what a lovely feeling … to have less fog and cobwebs; less rush and stress; less to assault the visual sense and demand action. A calmer energy creeps up, a smoother brow with more space to breathe freely. Remember, your ‘no’ creates room for your ‘yes’.
No to clutter (in whatever form affects you); no to high anxiety; no to rushing; no to snapping and anger; no to taking on anything more unless you have created space and time for it; no to busyness for the sake of external appearance and performance; no to invites just so that you don’t offend, or are desperate for acceptance. These ‘no’s’ will provide new space … it is how this newly created space is used which will transform your outlook and daily composure.
Yes to calm; yes to meditative time; yes to lists and organisation; yes to new ventures thought through and you have enough regular time to take on; yes to social activities that bring you joy and not the anticipation of exhaustion or fear around acceptance; yes to time spent appreciating nature; yes to time focused on those you love without your phone nearby to distract your gaze.
It is in this new found and protected space that we can peacefully and meditatively ponder God and his creation. Even if for a few minutes I can guarantee that your calm considerations will lead to worship. What a wonderful place to end up in. It is all about him, not us, and to dedicate time for this at whatever time of day suits you best, is the best change you could make right now.
The birds have it right.
“If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds”. (The Message)
“Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they”? Matthew 6v26
By ‘sacrificing’ this time and potentially re-organising our lives to accommodate this worshipful place, we will never ever regret it. Why? Because our Heavenly Father provides and protects. We are of more value, we are precious beyond our comprehension, therefore he will give far more abundantly, above all we ask or think (Eph 3v20).
Peaceful ponderings
Calm considerations
Mindful meditations
Your simplifying will make space for your glorifying.
Ingrid x
My sister told me that my previous post reminded her of this song … the words are honest and so relevant to many of us I’m sure. Even if God doesn’t intervene or answer our prayers in the way we desire, the key to our inner peace, acceptance and a greater future is to remain steadfast in the knowledge of God’s faithfulness and to hope in Him alone. Remember that verse in Micah (6v8)? We are required to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with our God … and it doesn’t say only when things are going well. The best thing we can do each day is to walk with God. If we do that, then his presence will be all the more evident and closer when we do face the next challenge this life has to offer.
MercyMe ~ Even If:
Sometimes if I’ve put a heat log on and it’s really got going, the heat when I open the door of the wood burner can be fierce. It’s cosy but it’s dangerous.
I reflected recently on the 3 incredible men which you may have read about in the Bible: Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. Daniel had appointed them as administrators over the province of Babylon. They were senior figures and entrusted with great responsibilities. They knew the laws and would have upheld them.
If you read the historical account in the book of Daniel chapter 3 you'll see it was a huge affair. King Nebuchadnezzar invited all officials throughout the province of Babylon to the dedication of his image in statue form. Heralds loudly proclaimed that at the sound of music everyone was to bow and worship the image. The consequence for disobedience to this order was also loudly heralded ... it was to be carried out immediately the disobedience was noted. A blazing furnace had been prepared and the perpetrators of this crime were to be thrown in.
When the astrologers came forward to inform on Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego the King himself chose to double check and gave them a chance to clear their names by asking if they would in fact bow down and worship his image. He even reiterated the consequence of choosing not to. He finished with "then what god will be able to rescue you from my hand?" Indeed ... could any 'god' rescue men from being thrown into blazing flames?
These men had faith beyond my comprehension. They knew their God was the one who created all things ... fire was nothing when faced with the power of their God. The reality of their personal knowledge of God along with their dependence, trust and faith on and in Him, meant that they did not hesitate or waver in their response to an unregenerate earthly king:
“King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”
I wish I had faith and courage like that!! It's just brilliant isn't it?
They hadn't received a note from God telling them that he would most definitely protect and deliver them ... they had no knowledge of the outcome. All they had was their resolute faith in their God. There's a sniff of definite defiance and repulsion from them that this King (as much as they were up to this point, loyal and obedient to him and do still show him respect in their response), could dare question the existence of the one true God, defy his power and mock their faith. They had no doubt that God was fully aware of what was happening and that no matter what response and intervention he chose, they would not waver. They simply reported to a much higher authority than Nebuchadnezzar.
These men had their perspective and vision 100% accurate. It enabled them to face what all of us would consider a hugely frightening choice with unflinching surety. Can you imagine seeing the furnace and then being walked toward it after it had been stoked up 7 times hotter than it already was. The soldiers escorting you being caught alight and burnt up beside you as they throw you toward the flames ... you're tied up and have no way of escape Agonising death awaits because you refused to compromise your faith.
I want to know my God like that. I want to know Him so that whatever I face, which may never be a literal fiery furnace, I have no doubt whatsoever that God is with me and His power within me has overcome the world. No matter the outcome, I can simply trust God throughout.
I love what happens next and Nebuchadnezzar's amazement! You can see him rubbing his eyes and straining against the heat to check what he thinks he's seeing. He asks his advisors to confirm that only 3 men were thrown in and they affirm that this was the case. The 3 men have been joined by another man who looks like a son of god ... they have been unbound and are taking a walk round the furnace! I wonder what they were talking about ... I'm pretty sure it would have been along the lines of worshipping God, thankfulness and encouragement. I like to imagine God choosing the specific angel for the task ... ‘it's fire this time, who will go for me to rescue 3 righteous men? This earthly king has overstepped the mark and must learn that the the God of these men is the one and only true God … and that it is Him who should be bowed down to’.
Sure enough the ‘fire angel’ came and the message was clear to Nebuchadnezzar. He shouted to them "Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, servants of the Most High God, come out! Come here!" An immediate acknowledgment from him that these men served the Most High God ... what a testimony. I suppose they could have continued to wander round the furnace with the angel for a bit longer, but they obeyed their earthly monarch when it did not contravene their faith, so they came out. Not even the smell of fire was on their clothing and how those leaders of the realm crowded round them to check out this miracle.
Nebuchadnezzar exclaims "Praise be to the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who has sent his angel and rescued his servants! They trusted in him and defied the king’s command and were willing to give up their lives rather than serve or worship any god except their own God”. Remarkable. He didn't seem to learn much about the extremity of punishment, decreeing that anyone disobeying his new law would be cut into pieces and their houses be turned into piles of rubble, however he had humbled himself in acknowledgement of a greater power than he ... God Almighty and that was all down to the firm faith of 3 men in the face of and in contrast to the whole kingdom.
May we hold fast onto our faith and realise that not matter how small we may be against the backdrop of this dark and present age, we serve a living, mighty God who has the power to save, to redeem and to change the course of history if only we maintain our trust in and dependence on him in good times and bad. Through all my life (and yours), God is faithful and good … he is the God of Hope.
I love this song 'Fires' ~ Jordan St. Cyr. The lyrics remind me that I too can walk through fires because God is with me; with Him by my side I need not be afraid.
Ingrid x
Overwhelm ... it's the straw that breaks the camel's back or death by a thousand paper cuts! Tiny and relatively insignificant things which when added and added to, can easily take us to the brink; the tipping point; the place where we sense a spiralling into somewhere scary ... a place where we feel out of control and alone ... it's fearful, unknown and overwhelming. We get worn down.
Words like 'tedious' and 'relentless' come to mind ... they don't exude positive well-being do they? So even though my circumstances may not be full of great trauma in the sense of persecution, enslavement or natural disaster, yet the build up of these tedious, relentless things can often bring us to breaking point … to the point where the next thing to go wrong may be the dishwasher breaking or someone spilling milk, literally. They can lead us to a point of despair and meltdown that for a brief moment in time I suppose, (when you consider our life-spans and then beyond to eternity its just such a little speck, a vapor) we implode into something of great and disproportionate magnitude which leads to responses of untruth, overwhelm and utter despair.
It's not about criticising or even challenging myself to never get to those times again because inevitably they will come. It's the learning process so that when they do come, they might not be quite as magnificent in their deploring, demonstrative emotional breakdown ... maybe that might be shorter; it might be more manageable. Then it's the picking up process; the learning; the rising and moving forward which becomes more of a reliable response. It's noting that God is in the moment, that He is there. It's us that obliterate our own view, create a fog, normally made up of our emotions that distort and distance God from our view even though He's right there; even though He's the one who is agonising with us.
He will see us through, He will not let us down. His plan is greater; His plan is wiser; His plan is for our betterment. And even though it may not feel as though he is answering our call because our immediate pressing circumstances or feelings are not being relieved in the way that we humanly wish they were, we have to rest in the fact that His grace, His love, His forgiveness, His vengeance, His justice, His desire to elevate us to a better place, a healthier path, a greater life of holiness, far supersedes and outweighs our momentary despondency.
God is most definitely there. I keep trying to really glimpse him and have an awakening as to his majesty and power. I want my life and all it entails to depend entirely on a constant knowledge and awareness of Him and His goodness.
Let's learn to speak truth over feelings.
Let's learn to trust God when we don’t feel like it … we’ll never regret it.
Claim the promises God has given us through his word … He cannot forget or ignore them.
God is GOOD, all the time. He cannot be otherwise.
It is moving on to the stage of grasping and knowing who God is that will translate and elevate us into a place where we will know his presence in a deep, personal and real way. We will know that despite grief and devastation He is there. It will give a sense of purpose and peace; preservation and provision. We will know without question because He is the God who made us; the God who sustains all things though the word of his power.
We lift our eyes to the hills and we know our help comes from God, God the maker of heaven and earth; the God who flung the stars into space; the God who determined the exact detail of my DNA for a purpose and a plan. He's not going to give up on me. He thought I was valuable enough to die for ... it would be illogical to ignore me when he determined before the world was created that I was more precious and valuable and of greater worth than anything else, so much so that despite rejecting him and rejecting his perfect creation, he determined on a plan of redemption.
It's incredible and I feel very ashamed that I got cross when an outcome didn't go the way I thought it should. I will endeavour to keep a firm grasp on the goodness of God. We live in a fallen and unjust world so we can expect more and more battles however it is knowing that when in the eye of the storm God remains in control and is good.
Goodness of God ~ Bethel Music:
Ingrid x
So like most of you, I have had moments of utter despair when the feeling of abandonment is coated with layers of anguish and internal agony. I have known times of terror when driving my 3 children home and being so overcome, that I am almost sensing suffocation at trying to hold it in; reply to them without giving away the fact that I’m crying; and concentrate on the road. Emotional and psychological pain can feel internally (but externally visible of course) debilitating … it is like your insides are being twisted so that your very breath is crushed out of you … there is an oppressive weight and a willingness to just disappear.
Where is God in this? Is he aware at that very moment of my feelings and my need for help? In my despair as I call to him for help, does he answer and do I get the help? It certainly doesn’t usually seem as though he does and in fact things can sometimes get worse!
I get all the usual verses … cast all your care upon him for he cares for you; come to me you who are weary and I will give you rest … my burden is light; ask and it shall be given to you; be anxious for nothing but in everything give thanks … and many more. I’m not belittling them or dismissing them, they are God’s word so they are true, but in our human emotional state, they just sometimes don’t seem to feel true. I confess that I am constantly having to pull myself up on being ruled by my feelings as opposed to what is true. Yes my feelings can be the truth, but the truth should be the primary driver to my thoughts, decisions and reactions to circumstances and attacks, not my feelings … they have their place but it is after speaking truth.
Where best to find this truth? God’s word … can’t really go wrong there! So God may not give us more than we can bear, but we cannot bear anything without Christ and it is his burden that is light … and he promises to carry our load. He’s actually in it with us, right there. So as I’m driving and crying or alone and convulsed with despair or confused at an outcome which is truly unjust, Christ is experiencing it with me?! That thought still seems baffling to me, but it’s much more acceptable and wonderful to me than him not being there at all!
As a member of the human race, I’m as susceptible as anyone else to any ailment, accident or attack … we all know that. We need to keep it real. I find amazing comfort in the psalms, David is just such a star at making me feel (there I go again) great reassurance as to my failings and falterings alongside God’s faithfulness. Some of his descriptions when being in abject misery are truly helpful. He can go from despairing cry’s wondering where God is, to describing in detail his fragile case and his enemies … the false accusation and constant hounding, even neutral civilians giving away his location to the enemy … basically being pretty mad and sad … to the acknowledgment of who God is. (Look at psalm 54 for example).
It is this flick of the thought process from present circumstances and feelings (both of which are valid and very real), to the undisputed awesome person of God that enables him to begin to release the whole of his situation into higher hands. This in turn leads to rest, peace and more importantly, worship. Even though his immediate circumstances hadn’t changed, his perception of them had … his shift in focus upward to almighty God led him to accept that God was way ahead of him and had it all sorted out. God would avenge and bring justice, therefore David could sacrifice and worship in thankfulness that the job had already been done, so convinced was he that God was with him and would both care and provide for him. It was not necessarily his place to meet out vengeance on his enemies, he could leave that with God, however what is interesting is that he was quite vocal about condemning his enemies and asking God to destroy them, annihilate them in fact.
I don’t think God expects us to go about being trodden down without a voice or call for justice and neither does he instruct us to take matters into our own hands, but what he does desire is our hearts cry to him … yes shout and cry; express rage at injustice; name those who have wronged you; confess your own failings; ask God where he is; tell him your hearts cry and concern … but know this for sure because it is what he says so many times in the Bible, He is there … He knows … He cares and He actually understands … it hurts him too.
I’d better stop as I’ve gone on long enough, but I’ll finish with this thought that keeps coming to me … If God loves me enough to have sent his only son to die for me, then he’s hardly going to ignore my cries for help … he’s not going to opt out of helping me in my life or dismiss my daily concerns … they’re all of vital importance to him. His son’s blood was spilt for me and my children, so every tear that falls is precious and known to him. It makes me shake my head in wonder and frustrates me that I cannot grasp it more or comprehend it’s worth throughout every moment of my life.
Ingrid x
🎄Hello lovely people, I have been absent although I'm not too sure you will have missed my ramblings that much! Yes I have had Covid and it's just been a busy term ... 'chasing my tail' (and never catching it) comes to mind.
I also note that during this time I have lapsed in my more active daily chats with God and my dependence on Him. Not that I have deliberately done this or have any doubts about my faith ... but sometimes it subtly just happens doesn't it? It's all about time and energy. It's very easy to slip into just a little bit less discipline with reading good stuff (esp the Bible), praying and listening to good music. Those around may not even notice the difference but before long other things crowd in and what was a good habit in daily spiritual discipline can fly out of the window big time ... it will become noticeable!
I'm thankful to say that I've been conscious of it (eventually) and concerned enough to want to pull my spiritual socks up and sort myself out ... well actually the truth be told, I can't sort myself out as that's the whole point ... left to my own devices and strength, I fail and lapse, case in point. So, it's about my focus and mind then priorities each day. I need to rely on God's help with this but allow His help. Every christian / saint will experience times of despair and distance, it comes with the territory of being human ... read the Psalms, they're full of inner turmoil but they are also full of overcoming ... crawling out of the churning darkness and back into the sunlight. I'm so thankful for the certainty that light always dispels the dark.
Yes it's a busy time but the busier I get, the more impatient and grouchy I get ... how is that nice or helpful as we approach Christmas?! So ... I need stillness and quiet times, even if it's just a few minutes every now and then. Just to re-set and re-foucs my mind on what is good and loving. I don't want my children to get so caught up in the chaos of the festivities that they loose out on the 'real magic' of Christmas; the real meaning and amazement of that journey which took a young woman and man with their donkey along the dusty roads to a Bethlehem stable. How courageous they both were; how trusting and faithful in and to their God .. God who allowed Himself to become human; to experience the fragility of birth and total physical dependence on a fallen human whom He had created! Mary must have had such a special heart for her to have been entrusted with such a high calling ... she caressed and fondly kissed the son of God as her own baby boy. On this miracle sits all the hope and salvation of mankind and creation!
In preparation for home group this week, I started to read the chapter of the book we're looking at (Music of Eternity by Robyn Wrigley-Carr) and was immediately challenged and struck by some of the words. I'll share them here:
"Advent is a season of waiting, expectancy and hope ... it's a time to cultivate an inner stillness ... our need for silence is paramount. Without silence around us, the inward stillness in which God educates and moulds us is impossible. Remember, silence is more than non-talking. It's a complete change in the way we use our minds. We lead very active lives. Our mental machinery is made so the more active our work ... Yet nothing so improves that active work as such quietude, the sense of Eternity and restful reception of the Holy Spirit ... Only in such silence can we look out of our workshop window and see the horizons of the spiritual world. (We need to) recover our spiritual poise ... to wait on the Lord and renew our strength - not for our own sakes but for the sake of the world. 'In the beginning was the Word' - God's self-expression ... look at Christ again, for the contemplation of Christ is the first part of Christianity".
The Eternal One says: "In returning and rest, you will be saved. In quietness and trust you will find strength" (Isaiah 30v15). Let us be quietly confident and trust the one who flung stars into space but we rejected, so rather than give up on us He did the only thing that could be done to secure a perfect redemptive plan ... He came to earth as a dependent baby; He lived a perfect life; He died as the perfect substitute for us ... just so that we could be with Him for eternity! What love! What an amazing, miraculous relationship ... let's celebrate it thoughtfully; in moments of stillness yet with hearts full of wonder, awe and enough love to share abundantly.
Psalm 42v5: “I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again, my Saviour and my God”.
Seasons greetings
Ingrid x
