When life just becomes too hectic and you end up like me, feeling frazzled, it’s good to be reminded to contemplate the realities of heaven ... sort of puts my running around like a mad march hare into perspective (possible self inflicting lockdown required)! 

Ingrid x

Midweek Thought ~ Freedom to live in the light ☀️

Dear friends, you will know by now, that I frequent the subject of liberty and the beauty of being broken but restored ... that we are set free to continue on our path of pursuing holiness because God sees Christ in us and has forgiven us through him.

Well here I go once again and it’s partly down to some daily readings by David Gooding, so a lot of these thoughts are originally his from his book ‘Bringing us to Glory’.

The starting point is salvation ... the amazing forgiveness found through grace in Christ’s death for us. He said “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life” (John 8v12). Therefore we follow the light and he lights our path as we take the next step. If only we kept our eyes constantly on that light and followed closely to the lit path, but we don’t ... we’re innately human and have a natural tendency to fail. I don’t think that’s a surprise to anyone and we are all as equally likely to fail as the next person ... the tricky part however, is to deal with our failure and return into close proximity to that light. 

I have always felt so guilty about any wrong doing, that to turn back and ask forgiveness and to allow the past to be the past, is really hard. I want to be forgiven but I don’t feel deserving, therefore I can put off doing what is best for me by keeping short accounts with God, and linger too long in a self inflicted state of guilt.

In his book David Gooding says: “Sin need not have dominion over you! It is possible for you to get up and start again ... Why? Because the penalty of sin has been paid. I’m not telling you sin doesn’t matter; sin matters a lot, and if we’ve ... gone into sin as Christians, there is no penalty, but coming back can be difficult ... But ... you can do it! And you are free to do it! You are not chained by the penalty of the law. You are free, thank God ... You are free to get up and begin again in the path of holiness and in the school of Christ”.

I find it encouraging to look at some of the biggest characters in the Bible ... take Abraham and David as examples ... they wandered and failed, then got back up again not just once, but many times. They were acceptable to God because of their hearts and even though they messed up but turned back a thousand times, God chose them for vital tasks because they had hearts relatable to Him ... they were aware of their human frailty and were willing to acknowledge their weaknesses ... they knew their God and were sincere in their relationship with Him. 

God can use us if we learn through our failings and acknowledge them ... there’s no room for pride, but a heart full of compassion and tenderness, even if it has taken a beating in the past, God loves and can use for the benefit of others and his work. No matter how many times I need to ‘start again’, I am free to do so because I am under grace and not the law.

Often guilt and shame can take a strong hold on our lives, limiting our freedom and hindering us from starting again. It’s inevitable that we will continue to go in circles fairly often ... a freeing, spiritually high time, to a despondent pit of anxiety and guilt. We need courage to face things about ourselves with which we have every right to be discontent, but we should never stay there ... to see ourselves as God sees us ~ accepted through Christ; liberated to walk in the light; forgiven permanently; unconditionally loved and restored to a perfect standing with God. We are his beloved and of great worth to him.

Personally, I feel that what hinders us on our journey of living in liberty and starting over many times if it’s necessary, is less about God and his amazing grace, but more about the voices of others around us. If we feel alienated or shamed; fearful of isolation or disappointment, then we will withdraw and hide in the shadows. Often those closest to us can be the ones who judge the harshest and will seemingly forgive and love, but hold the sin of your past over your head like some expected foreboding that of course you’re going to let them down again, or commit the same offense. Thankfully with God, even if you did do that, it’s as though you’ve started from a clean slate. He has no wish of failure or regret ... he is saddened by sin ... but his heart to forgive and pick you / me back up again is just the most beautifully liberating love that you could ever wish for. He doesn’t condemn (look at John 8) but encourages us to walk in faith and to follow his light. In fact, it is our duty to do so as his disciples ... to hide and feel shame or fear, or to let the threat of others dictate our freedom, is wrong and dishonoring to God in whom we trust (or say that we do) ... we have this great God on our side who rules with justice and pure love ... what can anyone do against that?

With a focus on Him as our path lighter, we will prevail ... and if we should fall ... He will be there to pick us up and welcome us back onto the path. Any shame put on us by others whether through abuse, legalism or a misinterpretation of love, is not God’s love. Those who know what it is like to fail and falter, to be belittled and made to feel worthless, can stand the tallest, knowing that the God of all the universe accepts them, (scars and all), and with this knowledge, he can use them for mighty works because they have tender hearts, closest to his own.

Ingrid x

Celebrating Fathers

Yes I know I should have had this posted for yesterday, but I forgot!

Father’s Day ... I am always so thankful for the parents and family I was born into. None of us have an advanced say in the matter and no family or person is perfect, but to be born into a home where God and his word were revered is a good start. 

My father is a strong man with strong beliefs but is emotional too. He considers things carefully and long ... he is often wise, is generous and caring. He loves nature and enjoys the company of cattle! He constant ambition is to share the love of Christ with others. 

There will be many who have or have had fathers of whom they may be ashamed or scared ... or maybe never known. I can’t emphathise but I grieve for you ... that’s hard. We can often, quite naturally, shape our view of God our Heavenly Father, based on our earthy father and it will often be unhelpful. No earthly father will consistently give unconditional love and willingly sacrifice of themselves for their child ... with perfect discipline and justice in love ... perfect provision and guidance. It would be unfair to expect it, but we can rely on our Heavenly Father for that. 

A good example to prepare for their life ahead ... little bits of wisdom gained along the way is what a good father can give. Umberto Eco said “I believe that what we become depends on what our fathers teach us at odd moments, when they aren’t trying to teach us. We are formed by little scraps of wisdom”.

Barack Obama said: “Any fool can have a child. That doesn’t make you a father. It’s the courage to raise a child that makes you a father”.

Frederick Douglas said: “It’s easier to build strong children than repair broken men”.

In the Bible, fathers are instructed to teach their children and bring them up in the word of the Lord ... to not provoke or exasperate them (Eph 6v4).

So, there’s work involved. Fathers are to instruct, guide, counsel, build up, show courage and share wisdom. To do that and be effective, it means they must spend time and be around their children regularly ... this is a commitment and not always something so commonly found these days. 

I also believe that fathers should be fun! Engaged in play and silliness ... outings and make believe ... dens and tree houses ... tractor rides and picnics on straw bales. I recall doing all these things with dad and many more ... being spun around, only held on by a leg and an arm ... the most wonderful Christmas days out to see selfridges window displays ... a seaside trip when harvest was over maybe ... long journeys up to Aberdeen for new year. So many memories and more to come. I am thankful for my father beyond words.

For those of you who don’t know, I no longer live with my children’s father, so to have a stable father figure consistently in the home is something they are lacking ... they spend regular time with him and I am grateful for that. Treasure your time with your father or as a father and seek to do right for your children, but more than that, look to your father in heaven and seek him ... he is everything.

Ingrid x

Let’s fly

Some days I can run … other days I only have the energy to walk … still other days I find myself stumbling. It may be true physically but it’s certainly true spiritually.

Thank goodness for the promises of God who will ‘keep us from stumbling and present us blameless before the presence of his glory’ (Jude 1v24). 

We shall ‘run and not be weary … we shall walk and not faint’. In fact we’ll soar! ‘We shall mount up with wings as eagles’ if only we wait on the Lord … he will renew our strength (Isaiah 40v31).

I don’t want to be content with stumbling around … I want to soar to heights where the air is clear and my perspective is true … where I have the freedom to be who God made me to be and to express his love, peace and provision to all who see me.

Come fly with me! (There’s a song or two there)

Ingrid x

Another poem

Sshhh ... let us hush our minds and souls

For somewhere close nearby

A creature stirs or bird takes flight

Throughout the stillness of the night

New heaps are made by moles

A baby cries, it's nursing mother

Responds to each demand

The rain it patters on the roof

The horse it stomps it's stable hoof

Whilst neighing to another

Night is dark and can bring fear

But simply we don't see

That nature carries on it's course

It's maker God it's living source

To Him they all draw near

God notices each tiny bird

He sees each flower bloom

He cares for earth and living things

Whether with feet or claws or wings

Alone or in a herd

So much so that to redeem us

From inevitable destruction

He sent His son, one with Himself

Born into poverty not wealth

A stable birth, no fuss

Creation clapped, the angels sang

To celebrate this moment

How could creator become 'man'

Was this really God's big plan

Why believe the great Big Bang?

In the stillness of that night

To only nature's sounds

That baby born, the King of Kings

No crown was worn or golden rings

But He would be the light

So hush our hearts and listen now

To what that baby said

He brought us light and life and hope

No need to worry or to mope

Just simply to Him bow

Creation both in night and day

Will happily confess

Their maker cares for them and you

He'll bless you if you love Him too

And in your heart He'll stay

So rise and worship Christ our King

He lives and loves today

He longs to give your lonely heart

A pure and freeing brand new start

He’s Lord of everything.

Ingrid x

(From my garden today)

 

Midweek Thought ~ What should love look like? (The absence of abuse)

I'm hesitant writing about this subject partly because it's very close to my heart and also in case I become too jumbled and unhelpful. I write sincerely and prayerfully, out of concern and love.

Where do we believe love comes from? I believe that the pure and holy origins of love come from God ... the God of love ... unfailing, steadfast, everlasting love. In the New Testament there are many reprimands to those who have left this love or do not live it out. Of course these people probably loved their families and friends a lot, yet they did not have God's love, peace and justice in their hearts, therefore could not live it out and show it to others.

So, there must be different standards and types of love. We know this to be true of course as we'll all have experienced these or some of them during our lives. Most would agree to the four main types of love: 

• Eros ~ romantic; sensual
• Storge ~ familial 
• Philia ~ friendship bonds
• Agape ~ God's divine love for all humans

Agape love is the highest form of love. Why? Because it is divine, unconditional, immeasurable, incomparable, sacrificial and pure. It would be disappointing and futile if you were to expect this love from another human ... elements of it could be seen and known, but the ultimate agape love will only ever be found in God himself and his son Jesus Christ. After all, he did sacrifice himself for us, when we didn't even want what he was offering to us ... we were his enemies. Amazing love. The mind boggles, but as long as the heart can accept it and cherish the fact that God's love embraces me, I am safe and secure for eternity.

One thing however, that no form or type of love should include, is abuse. Never. Thankfully it is impossible for it to exist in God's love.

SCIE (the social care institute for excellence) refer to 10 types of abuse (in conjunction with the care & support statutory guidance). Types of abuse now outnumber types of love. How sad. They are:

1. Physical abuse
2. Domestic violence or abuse
3. Sexual abuse
4. Psychological or emotional abuse
5. Financial or material abuse
6. Modern slavery
7. Discriminatory abuse
8. Organisational or institutional abuse
9. Neglect or acts of omission
10. Self-neglect

Anyone can be the subject of abuse, it does not discriminate. The perpetrator may not always be aware that they are in fact being abusive. Upbringing, teaching, social values, culture, religion, inbred discrimination can all be massive factors. Someone could be abused because of their vulnerabilities, including children. Most abuse happens by someone who is a close relative and maybe even in a very close relationship with their victim. Statistics like 1 in 3 women around the world will have been abused in her lifetime, need to change.

God hates abuse. God is for the oppressed ... He fights for them and will be the ultimate judge, ruling with justice and peace. The Bible is full of God's promises to uplift the weary, to aid the oppressed and to encourage those who are suffering to rest in the truth that His love and justice will prevail. How comforting.

So if within a christian marriage (or any relationship), any form of abuse is taking place, it is wrong and is not God's way of loving. It is not what he ordained marriage to be. As with any crime, it should be dealt with and not covered up or ignored ... it may be uncomfortable and awkward, especially if the abuser is known to others as the model citizen or even someone who takes a leading role in a church. 

Local churches need to become more aware of the signs and have an open door for anyone to share a concern. Pathways, safely put in place, should be governed by safeguarding principles with designated, trained individuals to help and advise. This is a bigger issue than any of us may want to imagine. Marriage is sacred, but someone who abuses their spouse within it, has broken the marriage bond. Abuse cannot be tolerated. In fact, to allow it to continue, is dishonoring to God and is misrepresenting his love to those around us. We should be the loudest voice against abuse with the tenderest of hearts for those adversely affected.

I would like to promote an amazing organisation that I have only recently come across and would ask you to take a look and reach out for resources to help your own local church to gain a greater understanding and awareness of the issue, so that you can help someone who may be suffering in silence ... scared to come forward because of the perceived shame; the thought of not being believed; the consequences of rejection and much more.

https://www.restored-uk.org

'Restored' are working away in a professional, informed way to help both churches and survivors of abuse. They have digital downloads and training available. This is what they say: "Throughout history the Church has been a catalyst for change, a voice for the marginalised and hope for the oppressed. We believe that the Church is the hope of the world and should be taking the lead in challenging injustice wherever it is found. We work to equip the Church to end domestic abuse and bring dignity and fresh hope to survivors".

It's often so easy to interpret passages of scripture to mean what we want them to say, but please do not every compromise the truth that God is love and that we must love as he has loved and commanded us. We are all made in the image of God and are highly valued by him ... equal, precious, worthwhile. God made us to enjoy liberty ... liberty to do good and not evil; to love and not hate; to uplift and not put down; to celebrate our uniqueness and differences and not to dominate or control.

Let's all check our attitudes and the way we love ... deep down, and how we show it. Take a leaf out of Jesus's life and teachings, and esteem others better than yourself. We're all sinners and God's grace is sufficient for all of us ... it's not about pride but about the security to be free to be who God made us to be. We should be celebrated by our spouse, never condemned, belittled, controlled or have any other abusive behaviour or language, whether physical or emotional, in our lives.

Strong words I know and I won't apologise ... I know I haven't quoted verses here but I have been thoroughly reading and going over these things. I can happily expound more and bring in verses another time.

Here's how to be ... "walk in a manner worthy ... with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace" (Eph 4v1-3).

We can forgive and be at peace to live in liberty, without abuse.

With love

Ingrid x